Court
Wizard Malagus the Fourth stood proudly before his king and the court. Behind
him, the common rabble sat, amazed at the might of the wizard as he offered a
curse worthy of the treason of the man kneeling before them.
“You will never endanger this
kingdom again, Margon the Black!” King Richard said and turned to Malagus. “And
my court wizard will ensure it. Tell us, Mighty Malagus, of your punishment.”
“Yes, My King! I shall inflict the
curse of eternal suffering upon him, a curse so terrible that it is only spoken
of in whispers by most. But not by me, of course.”
“Yes, and what will this curse do?”
“Why eternal suffering, Great King!
And then we shall place him in a sarcophagus forged from iron, and that shall
be placed into an obsidian crypt and then molten lead shall poured into the
crypt to make it impossible to get to the sarcophagus. And then it shall be
placed in this temple complex guarded by traps both mundane and magical—“
“Errr…” King Richard stared at
Malagus. “That is… rather more expensive than I thought. Wouldn’t it be better
to just give him a small grave, perhaps let the family put flowers on it—“
“Oh no, my King! For should he ever
be released, the curse of eternal suffering would then let him become an
abomination, a being of pure hatred, a being capable of—“
“Getting vengeance!” Margon shouted.
“Upon your children and their children!”
“Hah!” Malagus laughed. “The crypt
and the traps and the immortal guards that I will summon to defend it will
ensure that you never—“
There
was a cough, and Malagus turned, getting ready to punish whatever peasant interrupted his speech.
And
the man who had coughed was a peasant. He was in worn clothes, no doubt someone
who had come to beg the King’s mercy in some
affair.
“WHAT!” Malagus snarled.
“Um, begging the court wizard’s
pardon, but Your Majesty, if you think this is too expensive, I can help you.”
“How, my good man?” King Richard
asked.
“I’m a logger, so I’ll whack his
head off for a gold piece. Ain’t never seen anyone come back from that.”
Malagus
laughed. “Who do you think King Richard would
trust? My sorcery or your ax!” He glanced up at the king. “Shall I have the
laborers start on the crypt? It should only take a few months—well, the
building, then comes the traps and the magic…”
The
king stared at him.
Then
made his decision.
***
“And they’re saying they’re calling
him a headsman now! The former court wizard slurred out. “And the other kingdoms are also hiring them. I mean, nobody’s
asks for a curse of disembowelment or a crown of eternal suffering any more!
They just get one of these, these, peasants, and whack, off goes the head!”
“That’s rough, buddy,” the bartender
said. “But… if you don’t have a job anymore, I’m gonna have to ask for some
coins.”
Malagus
the Fourth groaned and let his head hit the counter.
End
